I ran about 11 million and a half errands this morning. Michael's, Joann's, and Target. Target was supposed to be one of those run in, run out type of things, but what kind of idiot am I to think that I can do that, with a 2 year old, better yet a hungry 2 year old. I even waived my right to a cart when I walked in. Must have lost my mind somewhere between Michael's and Joann's.
My arms are full of sandwich bags, bubbles, and an Abby Cadabby place mat. The important things that I didn't know I needed until I walked in the door. We are searching around the girl section, looking for a plain red shirt for Middle. Everything is well spread out, and Baloney is trying to lead the pack.
Enter Big Momma.
Big Momma is a mom with her kiddos. She has 2 in the cart, and one walking. She is of the larger persuasion, which I wouldn't point out unless it was pertinent to my tale. And it definitely makes the story.
Big Momma is doing her shopping thing too. She is humming along to some song, that only she could hear. Her kids are ignoring her like most do, and she is just enjoying this fine day, strolling and strumming in Target. She is kind of dancing to the beat, swinging her hips.....walks down the aisle next to us.
Baloney is racing up the other aisle, and Big Momma turns the corner. They both stop, like a bunch of deer in headlights, neither can move unless one does first.. I glance over, and Baloney is just staring. I start to call Baloney, so my kid will stop the embarrassing stare down, and so I can get her out of the way.
Then it happens.
Baloney's mouth opens, and while staring at Big Momma, she starts to sing... loud.
" I LIKE "EM BIG, (starts shaking her toosh and flailing arms), I LIKE "EM CHUNKY!!!
Of all people, my daughter yells this, while shaking her groove thang, at someone who clearly is not a size 2, or 12. Big Momma doesn't move, and I quickly usher my operatic star out of the way and to the check out line before I get my butt kicked into the next county. By now, my face is flushed to ten shades of embarrassing. I should have known it would happen. Thanks to this video right here, this has become Baloney's anthem. My parents sing it with her, and she will run up, stand right next to them, crouch low, stick the butt out, and chicken wing the arms, and get down get down. And we laugh and giggle. So, of course when faced with someone who is just humming and kind of dancing she assumes that the world is on the same rock star status as her, and they only shake it to the same song. I mean don't we all dance to "I like 'em big, I like 'em chunky?"
I need to invest in some Mozart around here.