TLC has this new show called "My Strange Addiction."
And it has given my innards a complex.
There will be no photos in this posts and you will thank me.
They have people who are addicted to carrying a puppet.
That's not an addiction, that's just weird. And attention getting. And quite possibly a sign that their mother slept with a Muppet, probably not Kermit, more like Fozzy- he seems to be a little bit of a quiet scandalous guy.
Then there is a lady with a bajillion cats. Once again, not an addiction, just someone who clearly aspired to be the old cat lady that no one wants to be. And if she wants to clean up cat feces all day, more power to her. If she's addicted, then Michelle Duggar is addicted to having kids... which hey... now that I think of it, I might just have given TLC their next guest. Send the royalties to me please TLC and you're welcome.
The lady who is addicted to her blow dryer....huh? Buy a white noise machine and space heater. Weirdoness solved.
Eating household cleanser- I don't get it. Of the gazillion options in the grocery store and dinner comes down to the household aisle and a toss up between the Comet or the Ajax? Do you serve it with a side of Cottonelle and invite the toilet paper eater over to dinner?
Did I say toilet paper eater? You heard me. Chick munches on some 2 ply extra plush super duper for your pooper paper. As in bypasses the popcorn counter at the movie theater with a dirty little grin because she has snuck in her own little pack of Angel Soft to snack on. I bet the bulk t.p. section at Costco is her dream.
And then we have the Couch Muncher. Who eats couch cushions. Opens that zipper and takes a bite of foam that people have been doing who knows what on for years. P-uke. At what point did she look at that huge piece of fluffy furniture and decide that it would be tasty to munch on? Is she buying them up on craigslist or do several of her friends have hidden teeth marks covered in their cushions?
Now for super gross. Pulling out hair and... gag... eating.the.follicle.
WTF! Who thinks any of this is edible? And why? Some people have no idea what a follicle is, much less if they should ever eat it. And why admit to it on tv.- or on a bathroom stall wall.
My stomach will never be the same. I'm addicted to changing the channel the minute this show comes on for fear my eyes will shrivel up and fall out.
Oh and they have a scab picker episode. I hope my cable goes out that day.